Ten Reasons And One
by Blank Paiges
Summary: England had a million reasons to hate America, and he could narrow them down to ten. It was strange how he could think of so many reasons to hate him in a second, and only one to love him in an hour. US/UK, failed fluff.


**Hi, all! I got this idea from...well...out of thin air, really. I have no confidence in it.**

**Summary: England had a million reasons to hate America, and he could narrow them all down to ten. And England can only think of one reason as to why he loved him. US/UK, yaoi, BxB, whatever you call it. Don't like, don't read.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.**

_**Ten Reasons and One**_

**Reasons Why England Hates America:**

England had a million reasons as to why he hated America, and he could narrow them all down to ten.

10.) America had no manners, and was the exact opposite of the Brit. America did not see the importance of having to be a gentleman, and was instead more open and carefree and affable. He couldn't read the atmosphere, and had the instinct to leap without looking. England was always cautious of his actions and extremely serious.

9.) America was annoying. England often found himself contemplating suicide if it would get the American to shut up. America was random, and would ramble on and on about a random subject until it felt like the Brit's ears were going to bleed. America certainly brought a new meaning to the metaphor, "Talked to death." He was also annoying when he was talking about how much better his country was from England's. It was quite irritating to hear the same old comments every time they came into contact with each other.

8.) Just how on earth did America manage to hork down that much food without getting sick? England found it hard to concentrate at World Meetings with America constantly chomping on a hamburger or slurping some type of American beverage. Every glance at Alfred told the Englishman how futile his education on manners had been to America as a child. And some part of his mind told him that maybe he wouldn't mind it so much if America had been eating British food. But he would brush the thought from his mind as soon as it came. Yes, America was a pig. That was another reason.

7.) Whenever England looked at America, he was reminded of the colonial days he had had with him, and it hurt. Arthur knew that wasn't America's fault, but he often ended up taking out that hurt on Alfred in the form of American insults and "bloody git"s.

6.) America had absolutely outrageous ideas. From building a giant superhero to shield the earth from the sun, to getting dragons to somehow fix all the world's problems. England often had a headache at these extremely absurd ideas. Just where had he gone wrong?

5.) America had grown up despicably good-looking. England hated how attracted he was to America, even if he didn't exactly _know _that he was attracted to him yet. Being unable to find answers to things was something that also bothered England, and whenever he looked at his former colony, it was as if all answers evaded him. He tried to find a rational reason as to why he sometimes found himself blushing at every bit of phsyical contact he had with America, or why his heart skipped a beat whenever the World Super Power glanced his way. But, no matter how logical and composed England seemed, America always jumbled everything up inside of him. Once again, another reason to hate him.

4.) America just being...himself. All of his taunting, jeering, smiling, laughing, teasing, playing, being a right _idiot..._For some reason, it made our dear Iggy feel annoyed. He didn't know why. There were a lot of feelings that America simply being himself conducted in the Brit that he himself didn't even understand. And when he didn't understand, it gave him a headache.

3.) America making a mockery of the Revolutionary War and of the United Kingdom, as if they were tiny things to be trifled with. England always responded strongly, sometimes with a clonk on the head to an outright shout of protest. But deep down, it hurt. It hurt to be made fun of for who he was, and it hurt to talk about the Revolutionary War as if it were a joke. America always talked about it like something that was over and done with, and even dared to make jokes about it. For England, it would never be over. He could still feel the rain pooring down on him from that day, still taste his own salty tears, the words he never said: _"I want you to stay, America. I love you" _lingering on his tongue.

2.) England couldn't believe that America believed that aliens existed ("Where the bloody hell are they, then?"), but he didn't believe in his unicorns, fairies, and other mystical things. America didn't believe in anything the Englishman uttered. It was rather irritating, especially when England was actually attempting to see eye-to-eye with Alfred. England wished they could just agree for once, _believe each other _for once.

1.) England loved America. He hated that most of all. Because America was a bloody wanker, and an idiot, and that made England an idiot for falling for him.

**Reasons Why England Loved America:**

...All of the above.

_**TenReasonsAndOne~**_

***sigh* It's done. Thank goodness. I honestly have no idea where this idea came from. I was kind of sort of...spacing out...and came up with this.**

**I'm pretty satisfied with the ending, though I have no confidence in this fanfiction. It's certainly not my best work (I prefer comedy), but it certainly isn't my worst. At least, from my perspective. :)**

**Reviews are love! No flames, please. They are mean. :(**

**LoveHateLove,**

**Blank Paiges**


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